32 Weeks!

I told myself that if I made it to 32 weeks I could write one pregnancy post so here it goes! 

First off, what is so great about 32 weeks? For women who are at a high risk of premature labor/delivery, there are a few major milestones. The first is 24 weeks: the threshold of viability with a third of babies surviving with no long-term problems. The second milestone is 28 weeks when viability skyrockets and 90% survive but long-term complications are still possible. The next milestone is 32 weeks. At 32 weeks (if everything is going well and your babies don’t already have birth defects… like bad kidneys) then they will have an excellent chance of survival without any major long-term complications. Of course, the longer I can go… the better. Twins are considered ‘full-term’ at 37 weeks so I only have 5 weeks left!

I had NO IDEA how different a twin pregnancy would be from a singleton pregnancy! When I was pregnant with Lincoln, I was nauseous for the first five months then the last four months I felt great! I wasn’t uncomfortable at all, I didn’t have to cut back on any of my activities, I worked full time until the day I delivered. I always wondered why pregnant women would complain… now I know.

I had similar nausea that I did when I was pregnant with Lincoln but the nausea still hasn’t completely subsided. From the very beginning of this pregnancy, I was more light-headed, tired, and weak. I was literally 8 weeks along and would have to sit down and rest after simple tasks like laundry, dishes, etc. There were a few times when I was in the teen weeks that I went grocery shopping and couldn’t finish. I would have to leave half way through my grocery shopping with whatever was in my cart because I couldn’t walk anymore and I was going to pass out. I started feeling a ton of pelvic pressure around 20 weeks and was terrified because I had never felt that with Lincoln. The only way to explain that pressure is that I felt like I had fallen into the splits and tore all the muscles between my legs. I felt like the babies were going to fall out. At 28 weeks I hit a wall. I was so done and I did not know how I would carry these babies any longer. My pelvic pressure turned to pelvic pain and I could not walk around or go up and down the stairs without pain. I knew I wouldn’t survive in my house (where I have to walk up and down the stairs all day) and that I wouldn’t be able to take care of Lincoln all day by myself so Lincoln and I moved in with my mom. I put myself on modified bed-rest, which consists of sitting on the couch all day. I get up to go to the bathroom, shower, or get something to eat but other than that, I don’t do a whole lot. I’m already much larger right now than I was with Lincoln at full-term. I constantly (night and day) have some kind of discomfort or pain (leg cramps, back aches, pelvic pressure, etc.)… some nights I have to sleep sitting up so my back doesn’t hurt. I’ve never had to live with constant discomfort. I know people who do and I have much more respect/sympathy for all that they endure everyday with no end in sight. I’ve also never been physically disabled and had to rely on others for the most basic tasks (cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, etc.). I don’t think the pain is as bad as the feelings of helplessness and guilt that I can’t do all I am used to doing.

There is no way I could have gotten through the last month and no way I would get through the next month without my mom. I can’t believe how willing she is to let Lincoln and I live here. She cooks and cleans up after us and takes care of Lincoln and takes me to doctor’s appointments multiple times a week. She is such an example of Christ-like love and service. She sacrifices so much every day to allow us to be here and take care of us. She doesn’t think of herself and has no thought of a reward or recompense for all that she does. She simply loves us and wants to help. I honestly don’t know what my little family would do without her!

I still don’t know how much longer I can make it and I am so grateful every day that I have made it through another day. Like I mentioned, I have had a hard time that I’m not able to do my part and help and serve others right now but then I have to remind myself that I am serving these two special spirits as I try to take it easy and rest so that they can be as healthy as possible. I still marvel that the Lord has allowed me to be a part of providing bodies to his spirit children and allows me to raise them here on earth. I will go through any amount of pain and discomfort for that wonderful blessing.